“Since Freud, people think you either want to be a man or hate men. You only exist in relationship to men.”—Sarah Schulman, A Different Sort of Sell For Gay Authors; The New Lesbian Literati Can Take or Leave Crossover Appeal (Washington Post 1993)
The reason none of the families and friends can detect anything “wrong” with these men who become killers is because these men are not exhibiting any behaviors that our culture VIEWS as “wrong”. Their verbal violence against women online is normal in our culture. Cat-calling and invading women’s space in public is normal. “Boys will be boys”. “Friendzoning”. Rape culture that blames women for their own rapes. Even people defending this man’s actions, saying that if just one woman had slept with him, he wouldn’t have killed seven others.
No one knows these men are “wrong” because OUR CULTURE ACCEPTS THE THINGS THESE MEN SAY AND DO. OUR CULTURE DOES NOT THINK THEIR WAY OF THINKING IS WRONG. That is why no one can detect these men before they kill and rape. Because they see the signs and ignore them.
This is why rape jokes are not funny. This is why street harassment is not okay. Why jokes about women getting back in the kitchen are NOT OKAY. Every single joke and microaggresion tells men that violence against women is okay. It tells them that women owe them sex. And it convinces men that they have the right to sex from women.
Rape culture and patriarchy led [the UCSB shooter] to believe that he was a victim because he had not had sex by age 22. He was not insane. He was not a mad man. He was a man who had been told lies since birth, and acted on those beliefs. He knew exactly what he was doing. He was killing women because they would not have sex with him, and he firmly believed he deserved sex. His behavior is sane in context to our culture.
People simply refuse to see it.
Look at it, and see it. See the harm caused. Look at the arguments made by MRA’s and see how harmful it is. Stop ascribing to these beliefs. Stop believing in “friendzoning” and “nice guys” who “deserve sex”. Stop it! I’m not asking you to challenge the men around you because I know how dangerous that can be. I’m asking YOU to stop believing these things. Whether you’re a man or a woman. Just stop.
“It’s the worst human rights abuse in the world: 160 Million girls have disappeared from the face of the earth because they were murdered at birth by their parents, when they found out that their fetus is a girl. …
In our own country… one of the worst places for sexual abuse is on college campuses. The finest universities in America are a place where girls are regularly abused. Quite often their rapist is a serial rapist who know if they go to a college campus they will not be revealed, charged, or prosecuted…
The same thing is happening in the US Military….
If this is happening in two of America’s most revered institutions - can you imagine how much worst it is in other countries?”—Jimmy Carter on David Letterman
“Date someone who meets you half way. Date someone who brings you a glass a water when they get themselves one. Date someone who makes sure you don’t spend money on ridiculous things. Date someone your ex hates and your mom loves. Date someone who’d rather spend a Friday night watching movies, than out with 50 people they barley even talk to. Date someone who sleeps on your chest and leaves a little puddle of drool. Don’t date someone who makes you leave oceans of tears.”—At the end of the day it’s the little things. (via gretzky)
She was a politician, tactician, nationalist and war leader who wasn’t afraid to duel her brother to the death in order to gain the throne.
That’sa fucking princess. She did things. And we live in a world where the term “prince” and “princesses” conjure two different emotional responses. Princes are taken more seriously.
Azula catapulted that myth back to Hell, swallowed Hell and shat it out all over people’s expectations.
I love Disney princesses because ~yay glamor~ but they’ve really warped a lot of people into thinking princesses are fancy layabouts.
Reblogging because Azula.
True shit. Azula was the antithesis of the Disney princess trope for sure. Disney has tried to subvert their princess trope before, but they always fall back to the same formula. Azula basically shit on the trope from day one. Even when they showed her in her much younger years she was a shrewd and cunning leader from the beginning.
Another thing I liked? They completely subverted the trope that the prince is the favored sibling of the ruling monarch. It’s no mystery that the Fire Nation was emulating Imperial China, and how daughters were not favorable to have in any household, but ATLA subverted this because the Fire Lord favored Azula more than Zuko because Azula embodied everything that one would expect from a prince and eventually heir to the throne.
And Zuko was mistreated and eventually CAST OUT because he just wasn’t as “good” as Azula was.
Multiculturalism is a wonderful ideal and I can’t wait for the day that tolerance turns into true acceptance of difference, when there is no longer cultural appropriation but exchange and convergence. White people will learn from PoC what it means to wash your ass and not shoot up schools while PoC will learn…uh…I dunno, shamelessness, I guess
“Most of the time, it’s clear that you actually believe the arguments you claim to have just for the heck of it. However, you know that these beliefs are unpopular, largely because they make you sound selfish and privileged, so you blame them on the “devil.” Here’s the thing: the devil doesn’t need any more advocates. He’s got plenty of power without you helping him. These discussions may feel like “playing” to you, but to many people in the room, it’s their lives you are “playing” with. The reason it feels like a game to you is because these are issues that probably do not directly affect you. It doesn’t matter whether most mass shootings are targeted at women who rejected the gunman if you are a man – though it should, since misogyny kills men too. If you are white, it doesn’t matter whether people of color are being racially profiled or not. You can attach puppet strings to dialogues about real issues because at the end of the day, you can walk away from the tangled mess you’ve exacerbated.”—An open letter to privileged people who play devil’s advocate (via drpepper10)
this here goes out to all the girls who do it for their parents for the girls who want to be paid so they can help out their siblings for the girls who have been grown women since they were 12 to support everyone else around them, emotionally or otherwise this one goes out to you, and your intolerance for men who will not respect you enough.
keep doing it for those that actually love you unconditionally, not for those who maybe might.